Medicated

I finally made the decision to go back on Zoloft.

I had really, really thought that I could go without, and had wanted to try, for my entire pregnancy. But in the last few weeks, the OCD has come back with a vengeance, from driving and riding in cars, right down to the general icky feeling that is constantly weighing on me. It especially sucks because of how much progress I thought I had made. I really didn't know if I even needed the meds any longer. I really thought maybe I could go it on my own.

Not that I mind taking the meds forever, if that is how it needs to be. I had just hoped that I could do without for 9 months. But after weighing how I felt and how that may be affecting the baby against how the meds would affect the baby, and talking to my doctor of course, I decided to at least do a low dosage.

No, of course I am not going to be on my usual 250mg. So my OCD will still be there, but I decided on 25mg and it immediately started to take the edge off and the dark cloud that was hanging on my head has already lifted significantly. My doctor says that he has had many women on zoloft, some up to 50mg, and their babies have been perfectly healthy. So here's praying that mine will be as well. I just really think this will be the best for both of us for the next 20 weeks...